He looks too sensitive, like he's going to write me a poem and cry after the first time we have sex.
Ok just saw a girl open a pillbox, dump it out on her notebook and count out 13 adderall tabs and put them in a baggie and leave. Oh hey college.
I just want you to know the floor between our rooms isnt sound proof "Captain Cock"
Avril Lavigne as a judge on Idol wearing devil ears. it's like every boner you ever had in 2002 just came true.
I can't even teach it... It's just natural slutyness.. My mom has it too
I slept face down in the dirt because I wanted to go camping?
Hey, I can't find my bed frame. Do you know who took it?
the kid throwing up and laying face down on the deck just asked ME if I'M okay...
Apparently, I kept going on about how i'm going to name my first born Ramen. I think this is a good parenting move.
I have a way to get him back. you're going to have to take one for the team and make a visit to the health department. you in?
Its the least I can do really, I mean, I did sleep with her husband...
She just drunkenly falls over and yells " I lost my footing!" in a british accent and then proceeds to run into the wall... did you spike her water?
Attempting to sleep without a bra since i got my nips pierced wish me luck. Also almost sent that to my coworker.
I wish I could take a screenshot of how things literally look from my eyeballs right now
should i feel bad about fucking you on my front lawn the day before you set me up with your best friend?
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