She told me she got a 15 on her A.C.T.. that's when I knew it was a done deal.
he was so hot that i framed the used condom. it's not trash, it's art.
if i hurry i can finally have sex while stoned off my ass
godspeed.
i have this theory that all the people in the world who dont like mayonnaise had very bad encounter with jizz once
I think he just gave me the 'I used to fuck your sister' discount
Did i throw a brick at someone last night?
He told me that he wanted to break up with his girl friend but only after we had sex, only for him to make sure I'm worth it..
They ran out of vodka so we started doing Body Doritos.
its official: beach shits are the exact same as mountain shits
I literally was just rolling on the ground and said to her 'this is what dying looks like'
My feelings for him are donzo molonzo but I can't turn down a pierced penis...
He kept saying I needed to go to the hospital and it just made me want to call him a pussy so I went to bed
Please can we have sex in this office for old times sake
he fucked me while wearing his "Reagan Bush '84" tank and my inner democrat has never been more disappointed
Girl in front of me just swan dove into the middle of the carpeted hallway, stood up, clapped for herself, and then continued walking. My life is complete.
Randomize