Ok pretty sure I just saw Mike O'Malley walking through the parking lot. I wanted to see if I followed him, would he lead me to the acro-criag, i've always wanted a crack at that bitch.
I love how girls just decide that guys who don't like them must be gay
I do the same thing. If a girl doesn't like me...I am like, "i must be gay"
I don't care. He smelled like a fucking chilli cookoff
I have to take his virginity. It's what God put me on earth for. It's my life mission.
I can't wait for the 4th. I'll probably get drunk and end up puking all over whichever 18 year old I end up making out with.
Say what you want, but those Fraggle Rock DVDs have gotten me laid twice.
You should be proud. How many people can say they GAVE a stripper an std?
Don't pretend like we're functional. We're gonna discuss this drunkenly via text the way serious conversations should take place.
I'm not wearing a bra, watching Netflix and eating gushers. I don't know a better way to spend a hangover.
he just sat there, in the doorway of my dorm room, chuggin a fifth like nobodys buisness.. don't know whether to fuck him or be afraid of his confidence
Let's go get coffee and handcuffs.
He was pretty bad, I wanted pizza the whole time.
Why is it that the asexual in our group is the one that gets laid the most often??
I'm shotgunning a meatball sub and watching flip or flop. i have reached a new level of singledom.
Lots of tissues. Maybe pizza. Only time will tell. The stages of political grief.
Randomize
