He saved me in his phone as Easy Jen. Should I be offended?
I wouldn't worry about it. He has me as "Sex Puppet."
Don't use my boy Weezy to support your whoreish tendencies.
I just love slightly exposed cleavage. Not too much to be whory but just enough to say "your kids will never go hungry"
It was not a dingleberry, it was a dinglemelon
you literally pushed me forward in the seat so you could puke behind my back without the cabbie noticing..
There are 144 bottles of wine in my mother's pantry. She just shrugged her shoulders and said it was for the wine pong tournament on Christmas Day.
Question: would Brian be pissed if I brought his 17 year old sister as my date to the wedding?
Look at you go. You're like the Slutty Librarian that Could. They should write children's books about you. Children's books for adults.
I've hit an all time low I just sent a boob pict to fat Randall the one I gave a partial bj to a year a a half ago
I fell asleep on the floor again. i dont want help, just a pillow. its kind of nice down here.
Another beautiful Sunday, another beautiful day the stick is not positive. Amen.
I have experienced an excessively hairy ballsack in my mouth...and it was horrifying. I keep feeling it in my mouth now. It's like hairy ball PTSD.
She's got Mike in the bathroom. He's covered in meat.
I feel like ditching all logic and responsibility and get shit-faced before the week's over. Thoughts?
I'm not too sure what happened last night, but by the looks of it, we must have gotten drunk with zebras.
Randomize
