Kanye's agent is the only person whose job sucks worse than mine.
I caved and texted him. But it's strictly drug dealing business so it doesn't count.
and then he put stevie wonder on to fuck to...and hummed along as I blew him
I think god is proud of me so he is rewarding me in discounted wine
He broke hus nose arm jousting with the traffic cones... We need to make head shots illegal or get helmets or something
Well, I'm at the grocery store wondering whether I exist or not.
My mom has finally acknowledged my soft spot for Russians. Finally.
apparently they stopped looking at spit swabs under the microscope in bio ever since they found a sperm cell in one students sample
I know. It was just so disappointing. I almost made it. And now the "when's the last time you peed your pants" clock has restarted. Lol
He just didn't want his drunk dick pulled out of his windbreaker at the family party
UHG. i just want to have hot lesbian sex and eat pizza with you.
Dude. I keep thinking about how I let a man gum my vagina.
I decided we werent gonna go for round 5 when he started trying to have a serious conversation about how blessed he is to have such a nice penis
He has a point, the man's penis is a legend.
His 89 y/o father walked in on us. Judging by the gasp/moan, I don't think the 1920s prepared him to see another dude inside his son.
Also I literally googled "how to fold socks" so that's how my day is going. How's yours?
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