What about the words "You're my personal dildo" made him say "I love you"?
I was watching truelife I'm transgendered. This tranny already got a date a week after getting a vagina. I've had a vagina my entire life and can't get a date.
we did it on the golf course and he threw the condom in the pond. some poor fish is gonna choke on it
I just watched her pee in a trashcan, im still probably going to fuck her, what does that say about my standards
So hungover. Sitting in class about to puke during this ladys flute performance. Not sure why were having a flute concert in biology
juast therw a cheeeeesestirng over the fnce. stuckit to sombodys car winheild... gonna luagh if i find it mlted in the mrning.
She was the shot vending machine at the party. But free.
Do you think you're physically and mentally capable of killing me? Because I'd really appreciate it.
jut tell him gently that you'd rather spend more time with his dick than his face
actually there are like 49038098 people in the bathroom for no reason. Singing My Heart Will Go On and pseudo fighting.
My kid just put flowers in my hair to make me pretty, then showed my boobs to an entire playground. He's either the best wingman or the worst.
Dude, you got arrested and then texted 911 to tell them you'd been kidnapped with a screenshot of your current location.
So changing channels while she's on top is frowned upon. It's back to thinking about baseball again.
well apparently i sat in the bathroom staring in the toliet at my vomit. it was blue. how was your night?
Why is the floor coated in a 2 inch blanket of popcorn??
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