I knocked on some strangers door, you didn't have to give me a fake hotel room number
My dad just passed me a joint.. this is a turning point in my life.
We hung out in the bathroom the whole time and talked about sex and watched some girl pee. If you don't believe I was there, check the bathtub for bread crust.
So I drew a giant robot attacking a city on the chem test. My TA colored in the fire on the burning building
Omg just remembered. I tried to kidnap a dog.
Text me when you wake up so I know you're ok. It's really worrisome to get home at this hour and find 3 men passed out in my room but no you. Love you, goodnight. :-)
You wouldn't be the first friend to shit himself in the last 7 days
It must have been an amazing night, I have "my pants are responsible people" written on my pants in permanent marker.
So for future reference.... it's a little unnerving when I can't get hold of you, and the last communication we had was, "Oh fuck... It's tequila"
Dude you went around coming up behind people and whispering in their ears. I dont know what you said but they looked terrified when you left.
Discovered that a nalgene holds an entire bottle of wine. Going mobile. Come find me.
I got picked up after "I just threw up in my face". Then I had very specific instructions involving the bathtub.
stoners and superglue do NOT mix
moral of my life: don't tell a guy you want to have sex with him. he'll get back together with his ex.
Hey can you send me a pic of your breast with a peace sign in the photo? I'm trying to win a scavenger hunt contest. Thanks so much
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