Did you hallucinate the same white buffalo that I did last night.
No, but I did see you shaking hands with a homeless man.
Come on, it shouldn't be that hard NOT to suck someone's dick
My wife caught me jerking off, I had to tell her I was thinking bout her
Nothing says Christmas like gin and tears.
just took my temp. 103. i wonder how tylenol and jager bombs are gonna mix
We're the kind of people who ruin family vacations
He may or may not be blacked out. We put him to sleep in the community bathroom. He's wrapped in your blanket and he's already puked on it twice. Using your blanket was my idea. Maybe next time you'll ask before taking my vodka.
Word is he has some crazy hawaiian STD
You beat him at the shot competition, and proceeded to rub it in while telling everyone to "ASK ME A MATH QUESTION!!!"
See, it wasn't that I broke my nose having sex. Its that I forgot about the bedposts...
Speaking of gay, some dude in a life vest just goes, we should pull our dicks out! To larry. Were leaving now. I saw penis
I think I ate my cheesy fiesta potatoes cup.
I started blowing him in North Dakota, and I finished the job in Minnesota. Oh, the places road head can take you.
I think I may have accidentally stepped in fire
Me and my dad hot boxed a hotel bathroom... That's what I call father son bonding
Randomize
