end the night at a gay bar...not sure how...but why the fuck do i have two condoms in my pocket?
if another girl says "im usually cleaner down there" I'm just going to shoot myself
if three guys were standing in front of you and they differed only in the hairiness of the groin who would you choose: smooth as a baby's bottom, the grass lands or the amazon jungle?
i think you're getting too neurotic about why she won't touch you.
Beverly Hills, 90210. Cleveland Browns, 0.
don't you miss freshman year when you could get away with "but i've never given a bj before..."
Just tried on my bathing suit for the first time this year. Had to drink a beer to numb the pain.
The little penguins are speaking with a hispanic accent. I dont know how to feel about it. Geographically speaking, this cant be possibly. This isnt cool.
Please get rnbert tn get chebk h'm in i'm no dead when he getr gome
Well on a positive note, crystal light now comes in margarita flavor
We started telling people we were married, and then we hooked up on a park bench
Where are you? This girl fell on a baby. She is just gone. Please Hurry
I'm hurrying
Dude. She just shit herself.
I don't really know how to say this, but I have an oven mitt to return to you tomorrow..
He said you stopped mid-fuck, called fives on his dick, walked out to grab another drink, and came back.
ok. i'm ready for you to come back and test the structural integrity of this futon.
I'm sure there are thousands getting dick today in the name of independence
Randomize
