nut hugger
i've alrwady decidided boys hate me plkease take notyes.
what
nvm
Just passed a strip club with a Marquis sign that said 'tis the squeezin'
This is the guy who showed up to the first day of class with a 24 pack of coke and a handle of rum in his backpack. He doesnt play by normal people rules.
I'm not considering your visit a success until we've fucked every cock in the ethnic rainbow...between the four of us we should have it done by x-mas
well, the drug dealer I've been fucking the past 5 months gave me a chilis gift card for Christmas, so things are looking up.
We'll wreck the fuck out of my furniture. How often does one really get the chance to fuck through a table with no negative consequences?
I just found out that I slept with Kate Gosselin's publicist back in June . Brb I have to wash myself endlessly.
Its like I've been given a sexual blank check.
hi I'm Emily and I thoroughly enjoy getting minors hammered.. I'll start my AA intro just like that.
We drank vodka and koolaid through a traffic cone. It got rowdy.
I'll be honest, I too would punch the 21 year old version of myself in the face, and then have rough sex with him.
If I could I'd magically teleport drugs and alcohol to you. Like a bad decision fairy.
I can’t believe the first text I’m sending you from this phone was about how I just got fingered in a smart car on tin can hill
I am so dumb. I made a mistake and let him get away.
Don't worry, there are other penises in the sea.
Thanks, mom.
Randomize
