So I have to go swallow an entire zebra. Ur on ur own girl.
First night home from college and I already forgot that walking around nearly naked with my laptop open to smut porn isn't acceptable. Sorry, mom.
so basically i'm the" little sister", he's the "big brother" and we just fucked
I just found 3 condoms in my math textbook... in the probability section... Under dependent and independent events...
I feel like I need to get rid of the black eyeliner, glitter, and tequila breath before I to that world poverty conference..
well, I was going to forgive her anyway but not because shes my best friend and moreso because shes my drug dealer
This conversation has now reached a level of awkward that even a passerby streaking hobo couldn't break.
I've got a permanent seat at the "Girls who eat their feelings" table this weekend.
I'm to the point that I've had the revelation that its physically impossible for my arms to be attached to my torso.
I can officially say I had a blunt rolled on my ass
That's the ultimate walk-of-shame: running away from your own apartment and hiding in a McDonald's.
Naked. naked and bneed help.
i now understand why vodka
And then the night went full on bisexual.
He kept saying "Ayyyyyyy" during foreplay... during sex.... during everything! It felt like I was having sex with friggin Fonzie from Happy Days!
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