everytime i listen to a chris brown song and like it i feel like i bad person
stuffed animals make me feel really maternal.
i was so drunk i stopped mid-blowjob to make sure he i was with my boyfriend and not some random. twice.
The working title of my paper? "Tailgating: A Big Clusterfuck of Kids Who Dont Actually Give a Shit about Football"
Of course I'm hard in the pics. If there's a chance that these pictures will cause a scandal later in my life I at least want my dick to look it's biggest
Just went outside to gather hail to use to make margaritas since we ran out of ice. That's God's way of helping us out.
the story is to long to tell you via txt so when you notice the tattoo on your ass call me.
Disasters an understatement. Hurricane alpha chi omega hit. On my way to buy carpet cleaner, super glue, and a new liver. Be back soon.
It's that thing where you don't have any food so you just drink beer to get your needed calories for the day.
We ended up at an Asian frat. I made out with two Mexicans at the same time and I pulled a muscle in my leg from twerking too low. Diversity.
Someone drunkenly cleaned and organized my car last night... Nothing's missing, so that's a plus.
She has "Massive Shits" listed as a turn off. That's very specific and there's a story behind it I bet.
Sweet, got a date tomorrow night
This makes me appreciate being single with no prospects.
If I'm gonna have a rotation of guys, I really should stop them leaving boob bruises...
I am luring the porn star to my house with chicken!
Randomize
