Revenge fucks should not count towards the total number. They're justified.
Drunkenly auctioned off my bed for 3 tequila shots
She told me that as long as she kept starring at the freckle on her arm she wouldnt throw up
Congrats on having the best tasting nipple at the bar last night.
I love that the power of margaritas brought us back together.
Thanks to her sunglasses tan, I can't look at her when she blows me cause it's like getting blown by a raccoon. A very talented raccoon
Just bought a waterproof mattress cover. Bring it on sophomore year.
after that, he'll be sure to remember me. i'll probably forget him, but that's the way it should be.
Am I allowed to compare getting cum'd on the face to a warm summer rain?
Sorry I drunkenly insulted your air mattress last night. You still could have fucked me on it though.
In two separate occurrences, I could have avoided getting my heart broken, and chlamydia, all with a left swipe.
She just kept roaring and saying Katy Perry had nothing on her. Wtf did she take?
Can I just fuck someone without it basically becoming an arranged marriage
You better not fucking die before we have sex while you blow fire. I'm serious. Don't mess up my sexual bucket list.
Bruise count after new years, 7. 2018 is looking up.
Randomize
