no it's cool...i'm just drinking and studying...cool night
Wish I didn't live with 3 girls so I could beat off in peace.
well we are all hammered and my parents are reminiscing about all the times they drove us home drunk from Christmas
Improvement. She went from pretending she was the soccer ball in the world cup games and it hurt when they kicked her to passed out on the floor.
I think a 5 ft pyramid of jello shots in honor of the egyptians is in order
He chucked my pickle at the bouncer. Fucker, I wanted that.
I think I just used lyrics from the Sister Sister theme song to let a guy down easy...
Printed off fake 'Producer' Sundance badges for us. Pretty sure they double as free passes for getting laid by 'actresses'. Testing this theory tonight.
He's a little cute, in a dorky, I-know-for-a-fact-his-cock-is-huge kind of way
Also. I plan to spend time with you at boomers, high, teaching ourselves how to pee standing up.
Can we please start going to the gym before I accidentally kill someone via explosive fat girl pants button accident
When that wave blew your top off I heard someone yell "SPANK BANK"
As a former fat girl, that's probably the best compliment I've ever received ever!
I just tried to order ice cream on my bagel. I think I should just call it
Yeah plus that night got so disgusting it's basically a repressed memory anyway
Sexy intern needs to have caveman sex with me
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