I either date the nice guys or the assholes. There isn't any in between.
You need to find a taint.
It's been five and a half years since she and my brother stopped dating. I feel like that's a long enough grace period. Going for it.
Oh, and no balcony sex...trust me.
Im blowing my nose and the only thing coming out is beer
Most senic walk of shame ever. This is why you go to school in Hawaii.
Why were my jeans in the freezer of the mini fridge, and how long have they been in there? On another note, I found my teacher's ID badge.
I creeped him on fb. I'm about 90% sure I just blew him in the same tux he wore for his wedding..
WTF? Why is there a pic of my tits in ur dad's office?
How long have I been using my debit card as a coaster?
You now have the mental image of me flying off into the sunset with no pants
sometimes you just gotta eat tacobell at 2am and cry all your feelings out
6 more days and it'll be a year since i slept with him and never went home
Yeah,I'm just gonna keep fucking other guys til this idiot figures out he loves me.
That was right around the time that the drunken mess pulled out his dick in front of myself and like 10 other people and started peeing all over the train platform while saying, "Sometimes a bear gets you brother. Sometimes a bear gets you."
Pretty standard Thursday night commute for you, no?
I just noticed, at some point last night I got on iTunes and purchased over 100 classical piano songs.
Randomize