obama could have borrowed sotomayor's dick when he threw out that that first pitch like a girl last night
What wine goes with Cap'n Crunch?
Kanye's agent is the only person whose job sucks worse than mine.
So it turns out there are pros and cons to having a broken wrist. Pro: I can give amazing blowjobs with my left hand. Con: I just had to open a packet of crisps with scissors.
Just drive me around campus, I will be able to smell their innocence.
So getting a bj to I believe I can fly is one of the greatest things ever
i now officially have to be stoned in order to look like my passport when i go to a different country
okay, please tell me Cammy is the one who put the picture and note on my desk saying "beat off to this homeboy"
hot buttered vodka was not a success. on any level.
So high I started thinking my desktop picture of a cat was too erotic for the workplace.
i was so high i thought the horse on my poster was running
Serious concern: will TSA confiscate my bondage rope?
I came home braless and wearing a tail....
I'm just saying, if you haven't been dropped off at a Wawa at 5:30 in the morning by 3 cop cars, you're missing out
Well guess who isn't a virgin anymore
guess who isnt wearing pants has a shaving cream beard and is afraid theres no cream cheese in the fridge
the answer to that last one was me. the answer to the first one is you, you sly dog
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