the pool opens at 11. by 1115 the ambulance had been called.
I just got a rly sharp new razor and was shaving down there...
and?
RIP clitoris
All I seem to do lately is get myself off, take naked pictures and drink beer. I don't know if thats a good or bad thing.
Just paid a $5 cover at a bar I stumbled by so I could puke in a toilet and not in public.
Woke up in an unfamiliar pair of underwear, running shoes but no socks, and a cowboy hat. Thank you crown royal
There is no way that a naked man in your kitchen can be explained-away as a "misunderstanding."
Idk man I'm just a giant talking marshmallow ready to be toasted and dipped in chocolate
I'm just saying, no one has ever made me laugh or cum as hard as you do. Sometimes at the same time which I didn't know was possible. Is there even a word for that besides love?
At 27 it's no longer called 'slutty', it's called having a healthy sex life...
Andy was trying to screw his door shut from the inside so no one could get in.
he said he was going grocery shopping but when he came back all he had was a jumbo bag of pancake mix and case of beer.
the essentials, lol
The hint wasn't even a hint. it said "stop talking to her" that's pretty straightforward
I'm bringing home frosties. I need to talk about butt stuff.
please tell me you're the one making all the weird noise in the yard..
Jesus Christ, it's not like going swimming. You don't have to wait 20 minutes after you eat to suck a dick
Randomize
