i've alrwady decidided boys hate me plkease take notyes.
what
nvm
my math professor just wrote "parallel" on the board, but spelled it "pararrel". guess what country he's from
i love beer. I convinced myself that I'm going to ace the exam tomorrow. I can't even do that when I actually study.
You just kept screaming at everyone 'not to break your scarf' and doing somersaults
I wore granny panties last night to ensure I didn't sleep with him. He said they made me seem more mature. I need a new plan
me blowing you awake is the exact turn i want our relationship to take
She asked for her virginity back. I don't know what to say
Why were my jeans in the freezer of the mini fridge, and how long have they been in there? On another note, I found my teacher's ID badge.
The only flat surface we had was a cheez it box so we snorted the blow off of that. Rock bottom really isn't that bad.
I just farted so loud someone came to check on me. Thought something fell in my office.
22 is way too old to still be having "thank god I think I'm getting my period" days
Just spilled a coffee mug full of scolding hot oatmeal on my bare dick. Hope you're having a good Friday night too.
I think I'm going to call this chapter of my life story "Weekday day-drinking in the park isn't just for the homeless!"
One time she showed me her pierced nipples in our high school locker room and now she has a daughter
Want to go to Victoria’s Secret? His fiancée is out of town and I’m going to try and stop the wedding with lingerie and lots adventurous sex
Absolutely! I love a good sexual filibuster!
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