Came home to a chalk baord that read:" Think like a rapist." Can't say I'm surpirsed.
My booty call said shes done doing the walk of shame. Wtf is that?
It's what anyone that sleeps with you, specifically, does when they leave. Some do it even when they just think of you.
First rule of pills: If you can't remember what it is, take half.
Yeah he is here but I can't let him know I am until he has like 30 min worth of drinks. so when he see me he isn't like "omg ew,NO!"
I have so much to learn from you, wise slut
winter break is going to suck... i have to put away my college personality and transform into who my parents think i am.
Just because your phone has a case on it doesn't mean it will survive a 5 story drop out the window.
I was trying to be really smart and save 10 dollars for each cab there and back. ...so I ripped a $20 dollar bill in half.
May 25th. Drunk Laser Tag party to celebrate our bdays. May 26th. Mushrooms at Chattanooga Aquarium. Damn
I think anything that happens between 12 and 2 am is just sketchy enough to be a good idea.
I'm honestly considering asking her if I can eat her out, as a friend.
Funny how I'm trusting a magic 8 ball I found in the kids toy section to tell me about my sex life
I just spilled my beer on a five year old. She's crying but I can promise you I'm more upset.
Will keep you updated on the sexual orientation of my new guy
I sense lesbianism
That's a weird power
You were filing your nipples with a nail file to "make them sharper"
Randomize
