Wait. When you mean sick you mean a cold sick right ? not something else.
I just cut my nipple shaving
You smell like a Billy Joel song
did it hurt when the cum got in your eye
not so much hurt, more like a stinging sinsation like mouthwash
I am pretty sure I told him the clouds were earth's purest filtration system and that snow was the rarest and most delicious water in the world. My lips are burning because we ate so much.
It really ruins the moment when you have to ask to resend the nude pics.
I have words... I can't think of them tho. they keep melting together and forming you and I just want to hump it.
The amount of knuckle children I've had to the Farrah Abraham sex tape is disturbing and impressive
My life is a clusterfuck of men and disorderly priorities right meow.
Can you stop being a bitch and just take some Kaluha shots with me bro?!?
I don't know if I should feel proud or ashamed of myself...ashamed for making myself a drink at 6:15am or proud for actually being awake that early.
Look I'm really high right now, and if I were to leave this house, it would be for the sole purpose of getting an ice cream sandwich. So can you please just do it.
I'm trying to find a place to hide weed in my mother in law's house...
Married life problems?
Everythings in imax form. Space oddessys are formed. Adventure at every moment and everything is epic. My mouth hass lemons. Yum.
It's okay to admit that you're into redheads.
Randomize
