giving a blow job on a jetski isn't as easy as it sounds.
nah, shes just mad because we went through all her fb pics and tagged her crotch as all the guys shes fucked
I'm 90% sure a girl here is wearing a bra strap as a headband.
It's going to be nice going to the airport without drugs taped to my balls like last year.
I feel the need to point out that one of the items on my to-do list for the day is "don't throw up" I have no concept of normal
You would be married by May if you put half as much energy into getting straight guys as you do into getting gay guys
Im in Ft Meyers right now looking right at an alligator. I have had a couple of beers and people are telling me not to feed him but Im gonna do it anyway.
Does it count if I'm only ambidextrous while masturbating?
I had another sex dream about you but it was very dissatisfying. As you finished you starting singing the star spangled banner. then you left. I was not amused.
I'm 99.9% sure the people upstairs are using walki-talkies to talk to each other across the room. Too high for this shit
What if he turns back to me, finds me seemingly fondling my breasts, and thinks I'm turned on by eagles?
Is there a lightning bolt coming out of your boner right now?!
I love that my family celebrates every holiday with a joint. Chanukah? Mazel-juana! Easter? What's more spring than the color green? Election day? What better way to celebrate democracy in action than medical pot?
I'm not in it for just the sex. If I wanted mediocre dick once a week I would have stayed with one of my exes.
location: under the moon. please find me. need ride home.
Randomize