Like my Aunt Merial always says ... big dicks, big dicks.
Don't you ever say "drinking at 2" as if it's a bad thing again. I'm asking you as a friend here.
he aimed his bare ass at the sparkler, farted, and it really did work...i love 4th of july anal fire works
you wanted the guy to gift wrap the condoms
we've had sex 4 times and he still refers to me as 'the chick in my chem class'
You were Q-tipping mashed potatoes out of your ear.
so according the 72 facebook statuses i put up last night that i don't recall, i would say it was a success. how about you?
Her stripper name is Geico. I'm not drunk or creative enough to make this up.
Someone asked me why we were having sex on the porch last night. All I remember is him saying he wanted the recruits to see. This has got to stop.
I pulled some girls weeve trying to pull the stop cord on the bus
Look at the picture I MADE him take with me...like why??? He's holding my foot?
I think there is a legit party going on the place we thought was AA
Nothing says happy Monday quite like coffee and oral sex.
i told someone my fallback plan was to be a slutty bartender and i needed the practice as i straddled them to pour a shot
I really hope this is just a phase, because I am not capable of carrying both of our drunken whore asses through life. Too much dead weight....
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