Turns out drinking large amounts of Gentleman Jack does NOT turn you into a Gentleman -- quite the opposite actually.
ISS teacher has a tramp stamp.
Shotgun.
I got a lot accomplished today, and the day is still young! I built a fort, hot boxed a fort, had a tea party in a fort, and now realizing how high I am.
you drew a penis with ranch dressing. tried to take a picture of it and dropped your phone in it. Then made moaning sounds while you licked it off.
Just got a message from a guy on a dating site who says he helped me remove lime pulp from my eye in a club toilet 2 weeks ago.
I'm this close to masturbating to his profile pics from 2006
I would be the drunk girl eating cake on the front steps alone.
he's definitely still old enough to be your dad. even your grandfather, if you come from a line of juvenile delinquents
Just found out that guy A from the threesome I had is now dating guy B's younger sister
This Halloween will be different. I'm just here to get shitfaced, not troll around looking for slutty nun pussy.
Happy meals everywhere. I think Ronald McDonald Claus visited.
Do you think I shall pursue this journey to the center if the dick?
What was the point of renting a $600 trolley if no one even remembers going to the first bar?
There's a guy in a life size dick costume, and two guys with white shirts that are each half if a pair of breasts in a red bra lol. They came separate but when they saw each other there was some titty fucking in the street, it's only 11
I dropped a piece of Mac and cheese in the shower and I almost still ate it. Stoned, but not stoned enough to degrade myself.
Randomize