My booty call said shes done doing the walk of shame. Wtf is that?
It's what anyone that sleeps with you, specifically, does when they leave. Some do it even when they just think of you.
Where??
Against the wall. In corner. Only gave him head though don't worry
i woke up today to a handjob from this really fat girl that keeps calling me michael phelps
He wants to be 'in an open relationship'. Fuck that. That's the online equivalent of letting him pee in a circle around me.
i was just skypeing her and i saw the vagisil medicated wipes in the corner of her room. i'll be breaking this off tomorrow
This is going to be another afternoon spent getting drunk in the shower, isn't it?
I just looked at the guy in the car next to me and he was wearing a divers mask. We just nodded cause we both understood.
Long story short, the rash from your last birthday party told me not to go to this one.
I'm definitely going to class still drunk right now and the freshman dressed as Hugh Heffner last night is texting me. I can't handle this.
he said we should drink responsibly and we all just kinda sat there laughing at him
WHY WOULD YOU SWIPE RIGHT???!!!!!
The same reason I ordered and ate almost an entire pizza last night
She can't even plan ahead to have toilet paper for her next shit
Good for you, kid with a beer in hand as you walk to your 11 am class.
I thought this was a dry campus.
That means you have to bring your own beer from home.
Omg. I meet up with you guys with bodily fluids on my chin ONE time and suddenly I'm a whore.
Do you remember telling those ppl that they need to mate and give you the baby and in 15 years you will all reunite and it will be a party?
Randomize
