Oh and I watched laurens last episode on the hills. its been an emotional day
Do you think most people who work at an airport Chili's can pin point where their lives went wrong?
Well, they emptied out the keg by the third kegstand for America.
It seems like every guy I've hooked up with all end up hanging out together, its like a cult.
I thought i lost my bra, but when i went back to help clean it was hanging up on the wall
You just kept yelling and saying, "IM NOT GOING TO STOP YELLING UNTIL YOU TAKE THAT SHOT"
I'm going to need a Jurassic park sized pooper scooper to deal with all this shit last night caused.
You can see my drunken state get worse with each picture
In my next life I better get to be a bird. Fuck flying. I'm gonna shit on your car. Every. Day.
Is it normal that every guy I hook up with tells me my hair is sexy as it's happening? Like that can't be normal
You can't just be this socially awkward and sexually frustrated and jealous as a fucking demon and be expected to stay sober.
That falls under the "unwelcome penises" category. Also that's definitely a sentence I never thought I would say
Isis wins if we don't have the loudest, kinkiest sex in every part of my house tomorrow
I just opened a beer with a child's toy at a 5 year olds birthday....can you look up the next AA meeting?!!
I'm not the kind of girl that sleeps with someone else's boyfriend. But I'm getting waxed just in case I change my mind...
Randomize
