we have pet lesbian snakes
I only have two rules. But i've fotgotten those rules and replaced them w 2 other rules
a slip n slide in 50degree weather was the 2nd dumbest thing i have ever done. the 1st was hitting the wooden fence i believed was supposed to "help us stop"
You would get kicked out of the study lounge for being drunk the monday of finals week
shouldve known this week was gonna be bad when I threw up in my coffee mug
I've officially decided that whoever created hate sex should be on my christmas card list.
how do I tell him nicely and in french that we can't have sex anymore because his huge penis will ruin me for other french men?
having my hair in braids makes puking so easy. i am being an indian every halloween
Taking back a box of condoms is possibly the most depressing thing i've ever done
just saw someone climb out of the dumpster at cvs and start walking down the street like it was completely normal
I'm gonna make a mold of your dick so I can make popsicles
we left when one of the guys tried to stick himself with an IV that he found
I'm getting better, this year I only showed up drunk to 1 final.
Also CANADIAN LIPS TASTE OF MAPLE SYRUP AND APOLOGIES. SORRY.
You sent me a pic of you peeing in two separate directions
and like half a dozen dick pics
Randomize
