His moose knuckle keeps winkin at me
The guy i fucked last week got done first on the test in my 900 person class. If im pregnant at least it will be smart.
She said that I needed to "pregame her so it can slip right in."
Exactly how does jacking off in my purse count as a 'early christmas present'?
He played a tape of his mad rapping skills after the final...his rapper name was Mad Stylz and he rapped about all the pussy he got in the 90's. I love Sociology.
I swear I only do things like fuck 19 yr olds just to hear how you laugh when I tell you.
Going to get a "plan B"urrito
Oh damn. God have mercy on everything w a dick in a ten mile radius.
I worked so hard to shave everything last night. EVERYTHING. He WILL be answering my phone calls. Otherwise he's passing up awesome random birthday sex.
I just want to like fall into a pit of hot wings beside a keg of yingling and eat my way to freedom
So his 25th anniversary post of love to his wife was almost verbatim what he said to me last week. Does that mean I win or lose?
I responded with "neat-o burrito" to his SEXT...he tried so hard and I just panicked.
Here's to not getting arrested this year on thanksgiving again. Cheers bitches!
I'm trying to secure Christmas dick. Idgaf if he has strep or not.
So this ukranian guy got angry and took his clothes off. Now he has my credit card and I can't find my keys.
Randomize
