What ever happened to making out with a few boob grabs here and there?
I love how all the girls on the plan b commercial wake up alone.. Like me
Banged a lazy eyed chick last night. It was like fucking an iguana.
Yea. I think between making the bride puke, feeling up the maid of honor, and sleeping with a bridesmaid. I did my part.
I just typed in random letters on his address bar... 5 out of the 6....a porn site was in the drop down list hahahahaha get a life bro.
I know I'm not the first to fuck in a park but i deserve props for doing it at 3pm. On a sunny day might I add.
Breathalizer & tazer party did not go as casually as expected.
Its bad when you wake up with a penis drawn on your face. Its worse when you find out its traced..
Im gonna wear a random assortment of things for Halloween, guy with the most creative answer gets laid
There was another blizzard last night and at one point I was drinking 3 beers at once. Driving home didn't seem like a wise option
Also, I just realized you seduced me while in a batman onesie... Well done, sir. Well done.
I have what looks like a rubber stamp mark on my cock from last night that says "Magic Marla Approved" Do we know a Marla?
yea talk to her if you feel up to it. Just remember who you are
Oh shit sorry I just gave lion king advice sorry not mufasa
I taught a straight girl about grindr today. She showed me tinder. It was like some sexual cultural exchange program
I love the barter system - he got laid and I got him to bring me some ibuprofen. A win-win really.
Randomize
