You feel like going out tonight?
Does a 14yr-old girl look good beat up? I'll bring the handle
Only in Montana can you find Septic Services that would display "Christian owned and operated" on the side of the truck. I'm oddly going to miss this state.
Killed two birds with one stone: found my wallet and unclogged the toilet.
After doing lines off my chest, she said, "do you even know how fast I could suck your cock right now?!!" and her friend said, "yea she totally could".
he has a knack for choosing the worst time to masturbate
If you can't find your cat in the morning it's cause i put him in the laundry basket and then put the laundry basket in the shower.
If you go to the bathroom don't ask why there's diet coke on the toilet. Loller copter. Blow is fun.
I brought his matress to the living room we're laying on it listening to rick james drinking vodka
let's just say if he has a penis and he hypothetically needs to put it somewhere... i would take care of that for him.
She said she was jealous that i could wear headbands, then growled at the ground in shame..
Why did my little sister call me from your phone this morning?
Things like this can't be explained over text man
There is a special place in Hell for whichever one of you put Ben Gay on my dildo. It was a very uncomfortable April 1.
I'm sort of afraid for my life tho. If the 4th of July can be the way it was a DMX show is capable of anything
Lies! You took my virginity, and now my cigarettes!
-367$ and a torn scrotum.. Panama wins
Randomize
