I can't get in trouble, i'm smoking a bong in the office right now
is the fantasy fufillment of sex in a hot tub worth the possible infection?
I have a love/hate relationship when men come within a 10 minute time frame.
Why do you proceed to call me "Queen La Queefah?"
as veruca salt said, "i want it now!"
uhh im not your indulgent father, stoned and im in the middle of making tacos. right now, tacos win
I'm thinking about that time I was in a trashbag and you spray painted my hair yellow
Bad news. I lost my teeth. Good news. I can still take a guy home sans teeth.
We had to coat check the pizza.
also since I use google voice my ads in gmail switched to DUI services after this conversation
Good. I hope they all got E.Coli from snorting coke off of some homeless prick's asshole.
You kept trying to use my cat as a napkin.
Another memory: We offered for a stranger to live in our house under the condition that he took the garbage out because it's a 'blue' job.
We are the best.
Ps. We need to take the garbage out.
He was eating my ass and came up for air, I almost choked laughing because he had a toilet paper cling on stuck in his mustache
It's okay to admit that you're into redheads.
So I'm buying milk, bread, yogurt & lube. Not awkward at all
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