i feel rough
just turned on the light, there is blood EVERYWHERE.
It's not called being bisexual its called making out with anyone that has a mouth
If a man's penis is referred to as "the family jewels" does that make a woman's vagina a jewelry box?
I understand Curling. That high.
Its as if he has to do the exact opposite of what I tell him. Don't come in my eye, pfshh it's in my eye. Don't come on the cat, pfshh it's on the cat.
I feel like I just need to fuck him after all his effort. like a "hey man good try" like those kids who get last place and still get a trophy.
I may have just flashed my roommate as he walked in while my towel was falling. Now he knows what an American sized penis looks like I suppose
Drunk me forgot I'm not an 18yr old raver anymore. Adult me is now in pain.
Dude you of all people would miss her giving him a handjob in front of the whole party
Apparently there's nothing on sonza for "giving a handjob while sunbathing"
Can I trade you chipotle for a pregnancy test?
The impact your presence has on my vagina without even putting your hands on me is quite astonishing, impressive and a little disturbing.
They pay me enough to pretend to be either helpful, or heterosexual. If they want both I need one hell of a raise.
Hey! you should come over!
Who is this? The number is saved as "Sexy Awesome"
I'm ne vrr drinkjng againnnnnnnn dforeal.
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