The vibrating part of my dildo broke, now I have to rely on gyration.
Be sure to let me know if your relationship crumbles so I can resume hitting on you
I'm in love with you.
huh?
Don't be nervous. I'm just saying - if you had a dick, I'd suck it.
smell my finger.
As a side note, my abs are sore. Most likely cause? Orgasms. Thank you.
this is the last time we take the mathletes drinking.
I'm pretty sure he's lost all respect for me. it probably happened somewhere around the time i had officially slept with every single one of his friends..
When we started taking double shots of vodka and chasing it with a lick of fruit roll-ups, I knew there'd be hell to pay in the morning.
I'm hiding her cosmo magazine. the only sex tip she needs is to not handcuff her boyfriend to her roommates bed and lose the key
You just sent me a picture of a federal crime. Like. You don't give a fuck.
That would be an interesting position... Not entirely certain how that'd work!
Gravity is no match for my libido
Are we in any of the areas with tornados?
Dude, i don't even have pants on yet, it's too early to think about tornadoes.
Well shove his head down there and tell him not to stop til we have a new president!
I've never had to say don't judge me for chip clips in the shower before
Oh and ps....i was sleeping soundly until i woke up by the sound of amy on the phone with her mom sobbing hysterically because she cant stop having the shits.
Randomize
