her vagine was all disorganized.
i guess it's bad bediquette to quote the kool aid man
?
he said oh yeah and i responded with OHH YEAHHHHH!
so i was creeping on him today and there was like nothing new except he became a fan of getting dome
i wish i could be like. "i like giving dome, lets be friends"
Change your flight to Denver. That's where my penis is.
You would get kicked out of the study lounge for being drunk the monday of finals week
I turned down free cocaine. I both respect and regret and that decision.
I pulled my tongue muscle last night. your welcome.
And apparently midway I said "hurry up and finish so we can talk about what a bad idea this was"
I just stood up and am wasted. I think I just admitted to my mom that I am trying to fuck everyone in New York because they're skinny and ethnically ambiguous. Meanwhile, happy hour isn't over yet.
We ended not having sex. I didn't want to explain that I was wearing a Unitard because all my socks and underwear were dirty.
We went to Denny's and he threatened to fight an entire high school track team by himself
Happy cinco de mayo!! Puke filled sombrero in the lawn needs to be picked up and whos never punched my fence boards in half needs to replace those by the way the owner of those panties (see attached photo) anytime you wanna cum over;-) hiii!
The world is a different place when I'm actually having sex
There are both cum and chocolate stains on my sheets. Can't decide whether this is a new low or a new high.
I never realized how you can accidentally go home with someone until tequila got involved.
Randomize
