Oh shit, I think we need to get you a hobby that doesn't include penises
we did anal to Party In The USA and he busted to Firefies .. felt like we were fucking in a middle school dance
Am I allowed to say that I would really enjoy blowing you again? Or does that fall into the "nothing changes between us" catagory?
is he the 3rd person to bang everyone in our group?
I will fight anything that is not spinning right now
Luckily my prof thought I was puking from nerves and gave me motivational mini speeches the entire final.
Fucken Tweens. They smelled like cotton candy and hand jobs my nostrils were offended.
I just saw an easily 300lb shirtless man on a Vespa. My day has been simultaneously made and ruined.
I plan on just grabbing someone's dick if I have to. They will know what's up. Why else do you go to a bar alone on valentines day?
If I end up in a healthy relationship because of this, I will NEVER forgive you!!!
Let's put it this way. Mom is bringing me a new shirt and I smell like lube.
My mom just asked me about the teeth marks on my headboard..
Also I will be receiving my own bra in the mail because I left it at his place, woops
I love you. Doing a double. Going to die. It will be painful. Let the world know i partied. God, did i party.
So I tried to catch a rabbit in Terraria & accidentally blew it up with a grenade made of bees. Monty Python would be proud.
Randomize
