he just asked me if he could show me what he wanted to do to me using his action figures. where do i find these freaks?
He looked way older than 15. He probably thought that since I have braces I was 15. Fuck. The 6 year age gap is never to be spoken about. Especially because what happened constitutes as illegal.
Sometimes I kiss girls just to make them shut up.
she wrote "SORRY" in her vomit and left
Dude, she knew her leg was on fire and she kept dancing. Bad-fucking-ass.
It's cold our but I feel like a very blazed penguin
when i was alone, his dick was there for me...
I am at the point where deciding not to drink alone is worth a rocky music montage in and of itself.
its like..once you have one emotional drunk night, you can't stop. i feel like i have to end every drunken night in tears and i dont think my roommates think it's heartwarming anymore
Triple a is towing cars for free tonight and tomorrow night. Can we take advantage of this ?
I learned something last night. Strippers can be on house arrest?
That's totally the Emoji for "just ran into some girl who knows I know she had an abortion"
I can't have my last hookup before 21 have been behind a dumpster
At dinner her sister yelled "he fucked me AND mom!! Up your standards hoe!!" Safe to say I ruined that family
There's a set of buzz lightyear wings in lost and found at work. I just need access to your roof.
Randomize
