i don't know how boys match. i think shoes & belt are the only thing. it doesn't matter. i just know if they look stupid.
alright she left, finally time to fart up the room
I came out of bedroom with my jeans on backwards, zipped AND buttoned. I have inconceivable talents whilst intoxicated.
She should get an extra 30 days for that Georgia Rule movie......terrible.
I asked her if she wanted to make this a permanent exclusive thing instead of a fuck buddy thing, and she just looked at me like I'm an idiot.
That's because you are an idiot.
went thru the pain of a Brazilian and he's passed the fuck out while i eat Doritos and watch tbs. fuck married life i want out
you started introducing us as kentucky and gentlemen
The timing couldn't have been better if I planned it. His mom walked away, I vomited in their mulch, and then his mom came back and offered me bread.
We are taking shots off of spoons and listening to Mary Poppins.
I know I'm not the first to fuck in a park but i deserve props for doing it at 3pm. On a sunny day might I add.
TAing a class of 300 froshies and being so hungover I forgot a bra is my way of making dreams come true.
I'll send you the picture of you double fisting vodka bottles, grinding one guy and making out with another... Every girl wanted to be you.. You make me so proud!
Apparently getting dressed is an all-day activity.
Great way to live...just blowing loads on upholstery
I haven’t sent any nudes yet in 2018.
That’s not true...is it?
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