What kind of soap washes out shame, bad decisions, and whiskey?
Irish Spring?
There is something about listening to Patsy Cline while pooping that makes the experience so much better.
I realized that I earned the name Classy cassie as i was throwing up vodka slushie in my bed with a guy I know by the name extacy boy
even my worst enemy doesn't deserve a bush like that
I puked off the balcony.
Not horrible
Into the hottub. There were six people in it. I had eaten all their pizza.
I cannot take someone's straight and gay virginity in one threesome. It's just too much responsibility.
all i remember of last night is that i was drinking jameson and then NOTHING i do remember walking a dog though\nwhich is sooo fucking weird
OH MY GOD ITS COMING BACK I PUT THE DOG IN THE HOTTUB TOO
Xanax and an ambien. And wine. I'm just waiting for mouth to mouth from some hot EMT. Sort of like the slutty girls version of sleeping beauty
Dude, if I don't end up wearing a banana suit in Milwaukee, I will consider that trip a complete failure.
I'm glad the semester is over. I need a break from the term "whiskey sharts" coming up so much in conversation.
I was afraid someone would drug test my pants so you set them on fire.
I have visions of guys in cheetah costumes with suits over it pissing on a children how are you
I dont know how I should feel about you making a 37 year old come visit you and then making him do the walk of shame from your dorm room...through campus
But I do cardio so I don't get winded during sex really it's not like I'm trying to lose weight
you know its getting late when the "nevers" are turning into "maybe"
Randomize
