it makes me cry that so many people are going to see you naked someday.
She's never had brie before last night, don't know if I can date a girl that doesn't like soft cheeses.
we were hanging out in his room and he decided to play WoW.. so i took off all my clothes while he wasn't paying attention and laid on his bed and started playing with myself.
did he notice?
of course he didn't notice.. he was playing a fiesty level 1 fucker that wouldn't give up..
hey as creepy as this sounds i still have your eyelashes on my desk
They walked in to the store, ripped up the phone book, and left. Can we get on their level?
John stretched a condom over his face and tried to puke in it.
We kept trying to bring you to the hospital but you had a tantrum and kept saying you would never be Miss America
Nah its cool some of my cousins have fucked the same girls and brought them on family vacations and everything.
Day drinking straight vodka out of a Mountain Dew can being towed behind a kayak on a raft. And no, there is no time difference, it really is 10 am.
Nothing like banging your nurse in the shower while staying in the hospital
He literally named all the parts of the vagina as he fingered me. No more pre-med virgins.
I wanna come do a blessing for your apartment. And by that I mean I want to drink a lot of whiskey and watch ancient aliens in your apartment
I'm sure I'll run in to him again, there's only so many VA detoxes.
dude, next time you say lets go on an adventure, tell me if there are going to be psychotrophics involved before hand.
The people at Perkins seem so judgemental. Big deal if i'm handcuffed to stripper in a star-n-stripes bikini. We still gotta eat.
Randomize
