Well how sick are u. Ive got a good immune system.
no one will drink with you if you continue to listen to beyonce
I am waking up at 7am to go to church with him and his family... I better get eaten out tonight.
well he has a gf so if he picks me up tonight i'll only him finger me
College students should never be allowed to have snow days. Never.
Nothing quite says Coachella like me doing high yoga in the middle of a field by myself
Best part of Friday afternoon drinking? Having ping pong balls thrown into my cleavage.
I wish I'd realized he looked like Skrillex before I was already in the middle of fucking him...
I should not be so motivated by a penis, but I am
HE ASKED IF I HAD SIBLINGS WHEN I ASKED HIM TO LICK MY ASSHOLE
I made a joke about The Hemingway being a really boring sex position where you blandly describe all the action and then kill yourself after you orgasm. He stopped responding. I've GOT to stop talking to everyone like they're you.
I just got a voicemail from some strange woman with a Russian accent. Are you ok?
What kind of sociopath goes to sleep at 9pm when I clearly need attention
are you drinking tonight?
I have an exam tomorrow
so yes.
So many questions so I’ll prioritize. How did I survive last night?
Randomize