He keeps looking? I tried to shag. I invited him to this table but he went to ze other one! If he shaves his 'tache I would totally hit it.
Just paid for that girls abortion on my dad's black card. I feel like P-Diddy.
It wasn't really sex. It was just rolling around, trying to make sure his dick didn't end up in my ass.
She kept sniffing my sweater and tried to guess what type of detergent I use.
Boobs speak an international language.
trying to figure out why the only thing in our freezer is an expired loaf of bread, a white t shirt, and a receipt from taco bell for 37.50 from last Friday
Just called a girl a cunt over peanuts. I think we both know it wasn't just about the peanuts.
Wait, just ask him if can you can join in. You haven't lived until you've taken part in a threesome with your father...or so I've heard
Nothing says summer like lemonaid, but nothing says fuck yeah summer like lemonaid and vodkavodka
oh and apparently my boobs are named "have no fear" and "plenty o'beer"
Welcome to Missouri, the show me your genitals state.
Personally, I'm gonna be Sexy Dobby the House Elf.
Heading there now. Already have a boner.
whoever decided snowing in 90 percent of campus on a night when the streets are flowing with tequila and skittles was clearly not an R.A.
That's the only way to watch Gumby. Either age 5 or high.
Randomize
