the next pure michigan commercial i see, i am going to pee in a fucking lake
Have you ever noticed every guy named Shaant has scene hair and date girls with racoons stripes in theirs
His name should be shouldn't
There comes a time in every man's life where he has to shit in a catbox to prove a point.
sometimes I tug on my anal hairs for pleasure
you've officially gone too far. we are no longer friends
Everything about him screamed your future.
Nothing says I have a hang over like telling your boss to "eat your shit"
If there is a god, you will have pink eye tomorrow.
I know you're trying to keep the moaning to a minimum but the banging on the wall is totally giving you away
Let's not refer to him as Dustin. That makes him seek like a real person, not just a dick I would like to experience.
So what do normal people wear to parties? Normal meaning not you.
You wear an inflatable farm animal to TWO THEMED PARTIES and I never get to hear the end of it...
I'm trying to ve beat feiesnd sent.
I did the walk of shame this morning and his mom hugged me in the driveway
Come over.
Look lady I can't have sex with you EVERY day. I have things to do.
It's nice doing the walk of shame at 530 am, the birds are chirping, campus is empty, and it's dark so noone can see who the Fuck you are
If he knew how badly I want to blow him he’d stop talking about his wife
Randomize
