if you like me you must not know who I am
I just ate 10 fun sized 3 musakteers.. I'm pretty sure I'm about to start my period.
Talk to you next week
omg. why did you never tell me how amazing shitting and smoking is?
i thought this knowledge was automatically promulgated at the age of eighteen?
She's helping me study for the final by writing the vocab words all over her body.
Nope, just sitting on the couch, eating an advent calendar, being depressed about the herps.
No she stopped screaming. Now she's eating popcorn. Off a plate. With a spoon.
I'm sitting at home, day drinking, while watching crossroads with brittany spears. I'm not the person you should be asking for advice right now.
Printed off fake 'Producer' Sundance badges for us. Pretty sure they double as free passes for getting laid by 'actresses'. Testing this theory tonight.
You kept yelling "wood grain wheel" and grinding on fat chicks.
The hell is wrong with me
Captain Morgan didnt let me down when i stand up it feels like the world is trying to hand me rainbows.
I've started day drinking because fuck everyone else
Idk man, we spent like 20 mins arguing about the moral ambiguity of fucking in someone else's car
I'm peeing on your house...you up?
I stared at his dick and then told him to get on his knees
You sent me a pic of you peeing in two separate directions
and like half a dozen dick pics
Randomize
