Free beer happened. I got hammered and aaron did his first keg stand. Then went all martha stewart on redecorating the bathroom. I remember being at walmart
What theme did he decide on for the bathroom?
Well as you know martha loves the northeast this time of year. I believe the theme was 'coney island' decorrated with hot dogs and macaroni
You were mumbling a lot and offered me 20 dollars to leave you alone
Apparently Sundays are the worst days for your friends to get their head split open and need stitches...there's only 1 doctor on duty
His drunk text included an attempt at quoting a Nyquil bottle in MLA format
Fuck him for salsa, please. I heard its a good recipe.
I'm drinking beergaritas with a dog who is high and a baby
your completely serious
I just watched the lion king for the first time in years. It's like the equivalent of a really good blow job.
But first time having sex and he went down on me twice?! I'm gonna marry this guy
I'll make sure to include that in my bridesmaid toast
I just wanna lay in my bed all bundled up as have someone feed me lettuce
Side note... I would pay good money to have witnessed the reaction of onlookers as I sprinted down Armtiage with a 15 lb bag of peanuts under my arm
So I've been thinking about this, and I've decided my bed is magic. Every time I change the sheets, a new boy is in my bed. I own the Sheets of Dreams-if I change them, they will come.
I didnt realize until i got your email that what i've been missing in my life is someone to send me dog gifs
Damn him and his beautiful face and body and penis.
Sorry for prompting a philosophical penis discussion at 10:45 on a Friday night.
ill give you some hints: blood, carnival, fog machine, happy meal.
Randomize
