I have a pussy blister if you wanna poke at it with a needle tomorrow...by this text i realize just how strange our relationship is, especially because you're probably excited
I think you mean your blister is filled with pus...atleast i hope
It took you an unbelievable amount of time to realize that your ass was on fire.
I cannot believe how calm you were last night about telling Katie she was on fire.
do you guys have 30-35 shot glasses? because if not, i don't even see a point in me coming
The narcoleptic neighbor conked out while taking her dog out again. Drinking game based on what the dog does and how long she's out. You in?
Annnnd I didn't even notice there is a guy dancing in a jock strap beside me. That explains girls smiling at me
I went to the bathroom, came back, and my friend was sleeping leaning up against the stripper pole.
Fun fact. I am at the police dept. getting served a warrant for unpaid ordinance... and the officer was a one night stand from like 10 years ago.
You were chugging tap water out of a running blender screaming "bubbles is Perrier mother fucker"
I woke up without my clothes on covered up with a towel on the floor because for some reason I took a bath in my clothes at 2am.
She knocked me and my drink to the ground with her ass. I have never been mad at someone for having a glorious booty.
Business idea: assless chaps for toddlers. I'm high.
I'll start working on my manners when you stop using please and thank you in the bedroom.
I passed out while searching "symptoms of narcolepsy"...
Just make sure you put pants on
....then im not going
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