it doesn't get any better than taco bell and soft core porn
If Ritalin and Plan B had an illegitimate child it would smell like me.
I can already tell this is gonna be one of those parties where we sit across the room and text about people.
I am at the point in my high where i now know/understand chinese.
sitting in class between the roommates of the two girls i fucked over break. this feels like a bad version of wife swap
fun fact of the day: the man setting up my checking account at my bank has thrown up on my front lawn.
The entire time I'm blowing him she's in the back seat lecturing me on the reasons why you're not suppose to do that while they're driving...
My hope for you over spring break is that you can be some disease free girl's random spring break mistake.
Did i tell you that he's legal and i got his number? Because he's legal and i got his number. THIS BITCH AIN'T GOING TO JAIL YET
The cop left me alone after I gave her my spare snow cone. It was a hot and humid day and that uniform looked stuffy. Yay stoner me for overindulging in icy treats.
It is clearly not my fault that you decided studying was more important than trying to bang our hot teacher for an A, so I seized the opportunity.
I broke her handcuffs. I feel like an animal.
I can't remember the last time I saw a penis in person that I didn't see a million times on text first
I found a hot kiwi last time and sucked his dick. That's what rooftop bars are made for.
I'm over being sad. I'm now onto thinking about all the ways in which he is a total fuckwaste
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