her orgasm sounded like a fucking walrus crying.
you used progresso chicken soup as a mixer last night
we dont know what were doing after yet. first up we have 90 beers and a party kit and fun hats.
I used the lotion his mom gave me for christmas to give him a hand job. It felt so wrong.
My mother walked into the bathroom at 345 am while I was splashing in the bathtub with the remnants of her birthday cake all over me... she looked at me and walked out...
I thought that u needed a break due the fact that your nipples were bleeding
She just kept saying "bless your heart" to him while he cried because he came so fast. I think a Texas woman was just what he needed
Come in your red robin gear. If you smell like French fries we can make love.
Chicks, chicks everywhere, and not a drop to drink. Dude, when did real life lesbians get HOT?
I found out that rock climbing and alcohol does not go together. Ask my broken arm.
I stepped in puke last night then washed it off my shoe with beer. Is there a grace period to respect before wearing them to class?
Crying in Target on a display sofa is normal, right? Asking for a friend.
Is Facebook telling the truth about your nipples?!
i guess she just walked over ass naked and peed on his laptop. gonna call an over price on that drunk sex.
Her cat was breathing in my ear all night, like that kid from Hey Arnold.
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