Oh man dude like 1000 to 1500 milligrams. Its gonna burn like bad though.
I need a shot of tequila, and quick death
So I walked out of my room and there was my brother....standing naked
i have a strong feeling i fucked one of the waiters here...
Can I sell my birth control in a yard sale?
Now if u will excuse me I have to go prep my vagina for this amazing sex filled weekend I'm about to encounter
The neighbors outside are screaming at one another about God knows what and everyone is too scared to go outside and we NEEd more beer
First stoner thought of the day: Life would be so much better if there were more things that were biscuits and gravy flavored.
He made me twerk for scrambled eggs... I regret nothing
Wait do we still get bagels if no one got laid
I know it doesn't seem right, but sometimes, bagels are just flat out called for.
My glasses were in the garbage this morning
Literally I can feel my heart beat in my vagina because of how sore I am
Is it a bad sign starting the new year off naked, wet, and alone?
Asking for a friend of course
We sat at the bar and made fun of everyone around us. I'm in love
he high fived his dick after we had sex
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