they're both coked to the gills having a shouting match about the powers and abilities of godzilla. and using the wikipedia entry on the topic to support their respective arguments.
I got mine. It's a truly beautiful penis. Plus he pulled his tongue muscle on my vagina.
i had a long naked conversation with the cop on why is everything fun illegal
I've friend zoned this boy hard. I made him change my nipple rings before he went home.
On a scale of one to liver failure, how bad would it be if I played thunderstruck alone?
God this is like a meg Ryan movie without the restaurant orgasms
I can only rely on you and Taco Bell
I woke up with a dread of barbecue sauce in my hair. Drunk munchies makes me a disgusting person.
he threw an umbrella that he ripped out of the table at the fence like he was harpooning a whale while the owner of the bar was outside then tried to blame it on an old man...
I started crying during a meeting at work and now I'm sitting on my couch drinking boxed wine at 1:30 in the afternoon. Fuck you too estrogen.
So anyways, we returned the toilet paper and decided to use the money for taco bell and slurpees instead...
I mean, drunk me really liked him, maybe sober me will too. Who am I to deny fate?
Autocorrect changes "sex" to "sec". I have been so long without it my phone thinks I made a mistake.
Alcohol. Making me feel good about myself since 2008
He sent me the milestone first dick pic this morning, it looked like a baby's fist holding a tree trunk. I'm frightened and aroused in equal measure.
Randomize