You'll put your fingers inside me but you won't be my FB friend?
So i'm in mason getting an ultrasound.. and there are a bunch of hicks in here with their wild ass children and this one young mom yells at her kid "harley sit!"
You should introduce yourself as garth. As in garth brooks.
im not an educated person. i just do things. and it works out in my favor
No. I didn't know. I thought mid afternoon shots meant the day could only get better.
When you wake up in your dorm right outside your room with the key in the door, then you will understand my pain.
You said you didn't want to drink anymore so you started shooting vodka down the back of your throat using a syringe. Oh, and then you aimed it at my eye ball...vodka in the eye hurts btw.
I wonder what acid is like for a blind person... Can we find this out?
Scary. I thought trees were a lie and that someone ha permanently stenciled them into my life. No joke.
My lecture teach is passed out next to me. I think I'm doing pretty good for a freshman.
Are you complaining because you're getting too much sex to find the time to masturbate?
Well, when you say it like that it sounds silly.
I'm not driving across town for three thrusts and an excuse
my face feels like mints and my body feels like tingles
Hey I know we haven't talked in a while, but I wanted to thank you for those m&ms you bought me for Christmas. Sorry I never got you anything then broke up with you.
Still had our rainbow strip poker new years tradition. End of night we were only wearing mask.
Did you get the usual surprise pics from the strange straight you like to sprinkle in.
I pointed at him and said “there goes mr fuckwad”
Randomize
