Well maybe next time you won't tell me to do whatever I want.
girl next to me is signing up for tough love. definitely getting laid.
Well on a lighter note, guess who just threw up in the elevator
it's been a while because I don't count the hooker
I got concerned once i realized you weren't there to hear us having sex. See I do worry about you.
I fcuked ip.
Is this your way of telling me that you got drunk in your office before meeting with your dissertation advisor again? Or that you finally banged that freshman fraternity pledge?
If Dave says he's going to have sex with her, he's going to fuck her retarded and turn her crazy. So run.
They have a stripper pole on their deck. Normal.
Just told my mom I need money for Molly. She was not happy
Well, it's a fine line between people-watching and boob-staring. It's a gray area. But we're in Paris. Let's leave it at that.
We also had a full on debate about how realistic and useful teleportation and time travel would be...and only used Twilight Zone episodes as "scientific evidence"
My husband has seen you naked more times this week than me. I don't consider it a bad thing since you keep bringing the booze to our house. And because my tits are bigger.
Considering who their parents are, maybe you should use vodka for the baptism.
Also we're getting drunk and sledding down Caroline street. See you soon.
Anything special planned for Valentines Day?
Does testing the strength of my coworker’s marriage count?
Randomize
