where are you
in your bedroom
how did you get in
your wife…
WTF
if I'm ever single again, I swear to god I'm going to have 87 venerial diseases
Clearly he doesn't understand my need to be surrounded by cats at all times
judging from the lines on my body they wheeled me back in a shopping cart
We should tie ourselves together anytime there is any type of alcohol involved. It's the safest way. I either end up with freshmen or weird ex bfs. You end up with a large cowboy. This is not good for us
Good. I hope they all got E.Coli from snorting coke off of some homeless prick's asshole.
I just had a threesome in the back of my mom's van. I'm pretty sure the rest of my week is going to be epic.
a 6'8" white kid in a Lin jersey just wandered out of my gay kid brother's room. when does spring break end, again?
He left npr on the whole time when we were doing it. ironic that i lost it on the 100th anniversary of the titanic. thanks michelle norris.
First of all you can never say anal too much. Second I now think you're a total gentleman.
Rarely has that paragraph ever been put together
I woke up with a stapler in my ass. Don't even complain to me.
It's fine. I wouldn't trust either of them to be my workplace drug buddy.
By talk him into it I assume you mean blow him into it.
Yeah, nothing like barfing into a grocery bag you just put dog shit into.
i regret nothing
brb throwing up in the dishwasher
i regret everything
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